Saturday, September 29, 2012

Worse Things

Once again, I have gotten myself into a pickle in the name of goodwill. An acquaintance from the singles ministry got kicked out of school and had to move out of her dorm. She was going to be moving to Douglas (45 minutes away) but working here in Casper so I told her that she could stay at my house one or two nights a week while she was working. I set up a cute little bed area in the living room. I was actually looking forward to coming home and visiting a friend.

It was nice the first couple days, but then it began to dawn on me that instead of this girl staying one or two nights a week she had moved in completely. Every day my living-room looked like a cyclone had hit and every day she brought in a new box of her stuff. When she finally was going to go to Douglas, I told her that she needed to take all her stuff with her because I did not have the room to store it.

Then two awful things happened. The woman she was supposed to move in with in Douglas changed her mind and decided that she could not move in with her, and then this girl broke her foot. So now I was officially stuck with her. At first I really felt bad that she broke her foot and couldn’t drive or look for a job or another place to live, but when I come home from a stressful day at work, I have to first pick up the mess she has made before I could relax in my own house.

I realized that God really does have a sense of irony when He deals with me. Summer is over and it will soon be winter and I have been lamenting for months how I “hate coming home to an empty house.” Well, thank you Lord! I now understand that there are WORSE THINGS than coming home to an empty house.

Pray the Lord finds her an elsewhere to go so that I can have my little sanctuary back. In the meantime – I wrestle daily with my desire to scream at her to get the blankety blank out and my desire to seek the Lord to see if it is His will that she be there for a season. Not to mention that I feel like I just want to kick her out and leave the singles ministry altogether. Not quite sure anymore why I am involved now that everything has turned to crap. Before this happened I was hanging out with everyone, helping her move and thinking – this is just like a family (all warm and cozy). Now I think – yeah, this is just like a family – a dysfunctional one where once again I’m deceived and used and kicking myself for having offered any help. You give an inch and they take a mile. I told her she had one month (which was far more than I wanted to; having been tricked the way I have), and there is still two weeks left. I’m not sure I will make it because it really sucks having her there.

I believe this is a test. One that I am flunking. Given to hospitality anyone? Does that include a near-perfect stranger taking over your house? Where does love fit in this – that is my daily battle.

Please pray for me.

Love in Christ



Nancy said...

I just stumbled into your blog. I just want to say that you are a riot and I feel your pain. If she was truly grateful for your hospitality she would take be cleaning up after herself and doing and saying things to show you she is appreciative.

This is definitely a pickle though. I think that you have been more than generous. Perhaps you could help pick up or print some real estate listings/ apartment finder info or help spread the word at your church that she is looking for a place. I think I would also google some rules for house guests, print them out and place them on her piles of crap. She may have no idea how rude she is being.

Good luck!

Ma said...

I'll pray for you Linda. This has just got to be awful. I have my issues with hospitality, too, but no one crashing our pad.

wendyworn said...

Thanks for commenting. It has been very stressful on me because I am in a constant state of anger over the way I got duped and because she has that sweet, innocent act going - and I dont. - I feel there are people in the singles ministry that are taking her side. Wow. I'm the victim but you are going to take her side? Crazy. Not to mention the fact that in a bizarre and horrible coincidence - I have had two separate incidents of identy theft since she has moved in. One with my personal credit card and one with my work credit card - both of which I have had to cancel and clean up the mess left behind. thankfully, the Lord has shown me them when they were brand new so I was able to shut them down before too much damage had been done. But I take my purse to bed and into the bathroom when I shower now = because I cannot rule her out. Just when the singles ministry was looking so appealing. Thanks Ma for any prayers. I need them.

Ma said...

Reading more details in your comment here makes me think of Joseph and all he went through. I know that probably doesn't make you feel any better, but I know you are being used mightily by God.


Keep us posted!

High School Diploma Online said...

well i rarely leaves comment on any site but your blog is really so amazing that i can't stop myself from making comment on it...

Mrs White said...

OMG! What an absolutely horrible position to be in. You sound like me...just too kind.
If I told her a month, i'd try my best to keep with that month and remind her that she soon has to go. Maybe do like others suggested and try helping her, leaving her some classifieds or something to get the hint. lol
At the same time, I feel your pain completely. While we do our best to help others we also have to think about ourselves and we forget to do that sometimes. If it really isn't working out you should find a way to sit down with her and talk about it. Let her know that things aren't working out like you expected and that you'd like for her to find something asap. Honesty is really the best policy. Others aren't walking in your shoes so who are they to judge or take sides? You've already done more than many others have. You have a good heart. But, you can't allow yourself to be taken advantage of and to be miserable by something that can be changed. Just a thought.
You'll work it out either way.
Thanks for sharing because I know that there are several of us that get ourselves stuck in situations like this.

Mrs White

wendyworn said...

thanks for your comment Mrs. White. I am sticking to the deadline - so she will need to be out by Oct. 15 and now that it is getting closer I feel like I can relax a little. It was a good lesson because I will be much more thankful for having the house to myself than I was before.