Thursday, June 9, 2011

Twilight Zone

When we were still in Wyoming there was a time when everyone went to the store except for me and my 93 year old grandfather. We were watching tv and I'll have to admit, he's kind of intimidating so I was a little uncomfortable with our lack of conversation. The show Jeopardy came on. So we had a little bit of a competition by shouting out the answers to the Jeopardy questions. My grandfather is quite the history buff so he knows alot of the answers. But I know some stuff too and was able to answer some questions that he didn't know.

Then came a strange question. "a layer of the ocean's stratosphere and also a 60's television show". (I'm paraphrasing because I can't quite remember the exact wording.) My grandfather looks at me, but I just shrugged. I'm wracking my brain but I got nothing. Then Alex Trebek says, "What is the Twilight Zone." Wow, I shoulda known.

(While I was writing this blog post my mom called to tell me that my aunt did not get that job. My aunt was really upset about it because she had felt that the Lord had set up the job interview and the apartment. Now, it is not clear what she will do. But she has to move from her current apartment around August/September no matter what. I said, "maybe the Lord wants her to stay in Casper?" So I may still be going to Casper to help her move at some point. The Lord's timing is perfect so we will just take it one day at a time.

I forgot to bring my guitar (and my cell phone) to the farm so I am not happy about having to go three days without practicing. Hope my callouses hold up.) As I sit on the back porch looking over the valley - I feel somewhat like I have entered my own private twilight zone.

I once believed in the Rapture and I regularly sent my tithe to a man and his wife who had a rapture themed ministry. Of course the false doctrine of the pre-trib rapture also has somewhere in the doctrines that the bear of Daniel is Russia, and that Putin was probably the antichrist or at least AN antichrist. Or something ridiculous like that - I don't remember now. Many times the Father had directed me to send them money and many times they would write and tell me that the money came just in time - that sort of thing. I was on their email list. But the Lord was beginning to show me that the truth was not in the rapture doctrine. So one day I got an email from their ministry. It was of one of their followers going off on this rant about Putin and how he was so evil you could see it in his beady little eyes, etc.

I immediately emailed that man and told him to take me off his email list. He was justifyably shocked and asked me why since I had been a stauch supporter before. I told him that I no longer believed in the pre-trib rapture doctrine so would not be a part of his ministry any longer. That was true of course, but it was the hatred toward Putin that this other follower had spewed forth and was forwarded by the minister that really bothered me, even though I had posted pictures of Putin with his shirt off on this very blog with the words EWWWWW under it. So I was not without my own sin in that respect.

Next the Lord lead me to a website that talked alot about authority and submission, the Jezebel spirit and head coverings. At first I cried like a baby when I thought I was supposed to wear a handkerchief on my head. O. My. God. You want to know about persecution? Go from being a beer drinking, cigarette smoking, cussing, video gaming carnal christian chick to quitting everything and wearing a doily on your head! Oh no. That did not go over very well with the fam.

I just wanted to obey, but said, "Oh Lord! Have mercy on me I can't keep this thing on my head! It keeps getting caught in the bushes and slips down and I look absolutely horrible in it. It's really not me Lord." Thankfully He led me to Target where a hat that hadn't been there the day before that was really cool with patches and stiches that went outside the box was. "Ok Lord, I'll wear this hat as a headcovering." Phew.

So then I spent the next couple years under the law. Oh you know. Looking down my long legalistic nose at all those sinners out there. What?! Are you wearing earrings? The kind I use to wear? Is that make-up. Well, I'm not quite to the skirt wearing phase but my jean's are modest let me tell you. Under the law, I listened to all the "old testament prophets" Doom and Gloom baby, doom and gloom. Yep. Any moment God is going to judge all you 53 million abortion people with all SORTS of natural disasters and there is just not enough repentence in the world to save the lot of you. I, of course, will be tucked safely under the wings of the Father because not only am I one of the elect - but I am also wearing my special hat slash secret headcovering.

Oh Phooey.

Thankfully, the Lord began to show me Who HE really was. An amazing God of Love, full of mercy and long suffering toward us and that Jesus saved the whole world by his sacrifice and resurrection.

That of course, is where the twilight zone comes in. Now what? What do I believe now? What does the Word say now? I guess I'm no longer an evangalical or a pentacostal or a charismatic. Even though, I never allowed myself an actually label. I went to the Seventh Day Adventist church for a while and a independent pentacostal, but I never identified myself as an Adventist or Pentacostal. I used to say, "I'm a member of the Body of Christ so I guess I can go to whatever church I want."

There is a group that calls themselves Christian Universalists that I suppose I can identify myself with, but even they all have a bunch of different doctrines between them. Some of which I think tend to want to mix New Age and Christianity, which I think is a dangerous road to be on.

So once again, I'm not going to put myself under another man-made doctrine by giving myself a label. I'm going to believe the part of God's Word that is the simple truth. God sent His only Begotten son, not to condemn the world but to save it. Also. I have figured out that I really don't know anything at all. I thought I knew the truth when I believed in the rapture. I thought I knew the truth when I was under the New Testament law with it's head coverings and eternal torment.

I am now at the place where I have determined not to know ANYTHING but Christ, and Him crucified. Maybe now, the Lord can begin to teach me His truth.

Blessings from the Twilight Zone
In Christ!
Linda

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi Linda

If you lived in the Middle East as an Arab you would feel very uncomfortable not wearing a head covering. Living in the "free" US of A you feel uncomfortable wearing the head covering. Why is that? The reason is because you care what man thinks more highly than what God thinks. You are worried that the covering is not flattering to your beauty or that you will look like one of those poor Armish folks, hence you try to find a "trendy" compromise - enough to please man and God. Wearing a God ordained head covering for Western women is cross which few choose to take up.

Regards Richard

wendyworn said...

There is a woman who is wearing a bandana who is in rebellion against her husband and a woman who has nothing on her head, but is in perfect submission to her husband. Which one is truly obeying the principle of the headcovering?

The letter killeth but the spirit gives life.

Thanks for commenting Richard.

With love and respect
Linda

Anonymous said...

Hi Linda,

Wearing a head covering is being obedient to the scriptures. Having a submissive heart is a work of the Holy Ghost brought about through the crucifixion of our flesh. They are separate but interrelated issues. It is possible to wear a head covering but still be a rebel, just like it is possible to quote scripture and be a devil. Don't be one of those who is always learning but never coming to a knowledge of the truth.

Regards

Richard

wendyworn said...

It is a mathematical algebraic equation.

a = 2

3(a) + 2 = 8
3(2) + 2 = 8
6 + 2 = 8

The head of the woman is the man

head = the man

But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head (the man) uncovered dishonoureth her head (the man): for that is even all one as if she were shaven.

If I am ever learning but never coming to a knowledge of truth, So be it. You don't have to read what I write.

still with love and respect
Linda

Anonymous said...

Hi Linda

Sorry I should put the scripture in context for you.

This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.

For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,

Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,

Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;

Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.

For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts,

Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.

Now as Jannes and Jambres withstood Moses, so do these also resist the truth: men of corrupt minds, reprobate concerning the faith.

But they shall proceed no further: for their folly shall be manifest unto all men, as their's also was.
Regards

Richard

wendyworn said...

I understood the context of the verse Richard. I certainly do not want to get into a doctrinal argument with you. Are you trying to make a point with the above verse?

the love and respect hasn't lessened...
Linda

Kim said...

I hear ya, Linda! I can so empathize with you. I, too, am listening to the call of my Savior to study the Word for myself, but I do think we have to rely a little on those who have gone on before us and have studied the Word with wisdom, the leading of the holy spirit and patience and endurance. I won't throw the baby, the bath water and the tub! I am praying that the holy spirit will show me what is the truth He wants me to live by. I will pray for that for you, too! I am enjoying your recent posts. May you be blessed with an extra measure of patience, faith and wisdom!

Your Friend,

Kim

wendyworn said...

Yes Please Kim! I can definiately use all the prayers that I can get. It is a work of the Holy Spirit and I am beginning to see that it is an INDIVIDUAL work - because I don't think that any two Christians can agree 100% on every doctrine. But yes I do also agree that we need to seek those who have come to the truth before us. Just also believe that no one person has the corner on it - LEAST OF ALL ME!!! Ha ha.

thanks for commenting!
Linda

Alicia said...

I get'cha Sis! Trust me, Thank God for liberty in Christ.

There is nothing like allowing God to teach you what you need to know.

I've had enough of traditions of men, and could never go back to anything that keeps me in bondage.

Who the Son sets free is FREE INDEED!

Can I get a AMEN? Amen Sis!

wendyworn said...

AMEN!

AMEN!

Ma said...

I really enjoyed this post Linda.

He continue to teach...even when we think we've "arrived" at the truth.

I am guilty of this a lot.

Mrs. Jennifer said...

Hi Linda!
As for the headcovering, you have to go with the convictions Jesus has set forth for you. It is only necessary - not for salvation, but for obedience - if the Holy Spirit has convicted you about it.
At my church we have a woman who has been convicted about headcoverings, a family convicted about wearing skirts/dresses, one family about birth control, and on and on! But those are not church mandates or points of division. I think we love one another and suppport each other as long as we stay in The Truth.

Some scripture I pray is 1 Kings 4:29 - wisdom, understanding exceeding much, and largeness of heart
and
Isaiah 11:2 - the spirit of the Lord to rest upon [me], the spirit of wisdom and understanding, the spirit of counsel and might, the spirit of knowledge and the fear of the Lord

It is important that you find a group of believers to meet with. Out of love, I pray you steer clear of the churches you mentioned.

wendyworn said...

Ma and Miss Jennifer thank you both for commenting!

Miss Jennifer - I definiately agree that what the Lord convicts us of we need to obey. It was the Lord who originally convicted me of a headcovering and it was the Lord that released me from that conviction. That is why we are not to judge people on whether they eat herbs or observe a holy day. To the Lord they do those things etc.

I do want to find a group of believers to fellowship - but so far the Lord has not opened the doors for me. I believe He will in His time.

blessings in Christ!
Linda

Alicia said...

Hey Sis,

I found some more 'advanced' blog templates. I just thought I would share this link with you.

They are all for "Blogger" by Google, so it is perfect.

I want to update my page. I want a darker background and you can even do slideshows on some of these pages.

Pretty neat!

TTYL!

Alicia said...

Did I post the link? I can't remember? lol!

wendyworn said...

No link Alicia!

: )

Alicia said...

LOL!! Sorry, something told me to come back and check to make sure I did.

Girl, I am not 100%. lol!

Ok, here it is.

http://btemplates.com/

Alicia said...

Oh, I wanted to say. I tried out a few of the templates, but I ended up using the different ones on here. There are soooooo many to choose from.

I found that we could remove certain backgrounds and they have other pics u can replace and use as a background. I changed my font, etc..Everything really.

I am on a different computer than I was use to using. The other one was HD and everything was 'so' clear. This computer is totally NOT HD and much smaller, so I have blind spots with how the page really probably looks. I mean I can see it, but HD makes a difference big time.

This comp is another testimony in itself. A lady I met online said the Lord told her to send me this comp some months ago, so she did.

The computer we were using here was literally 'brand new'. I mean top of the line--Touch Screen, Windows 7, the Huge TV like screen..and we had only had it a few months,then It crashed like two weeks ago. It had got a serious bug. She can not afford to get it fixed just yet...

THANK GOD I HAD THIS COMPUTER! God is good!!! If not, we would be without a computer TOTALLY.

God already knew that comp would crash and had that woman to send me this one ahead of time.

God is awesome!! :)

Just thought I would share.

Let me know how my page looks Sis. If it is too bright, or whatever. I mean I can see it clearly, but the sides of the screen are not as wide so I miss how the background FULLY looks a bit.

Thank sis!