Soldiers of the Light

My aunt lives in a pretty seedy part of town, which is one of the reasons why she is trying to move. A block away is a plain white building with a cross on the side. Normally it is quiet but on Friday nights it is filled with music. The name of the ministry is "Soldiers of the Light." Friday's they have Christian bands play or sometimes a teaching but each time it is a little different. We have gone the last three Fridays and it is really enjoyable.

The local baseball team is called the Ghosts (as in Casper - get it?) Tonight they are playing on the home field and afterward they had a fireworks show that we could see from my aunt's front door.

It has been an exciting week. My aunt got offered a different job so that she will be working Mon-Fri 8-5 instead of the crazy schedule she had been working. An answer to prayer. I had a couple job interviews this afternoon, but I am applying at GameStop tomorrow and that is the job I really want, but it is all in the Lord's hands and He will order my steps here.

Tomorrow my aunt and I will run errands and look at more apartments. So far, we haven't found the right one to move. My aunt is not ready to give her 30 day notice by Aug 1st, but she is still hoping to give her notice by Aug 15. We are having a garage sale next weekend so we will be working on getting that ready most evenings next week.

I have to get my B string replaced. Seems there is a worn spot on the string that is making one bad note - it just happens to be a note used all the time, which I guess explains the worn spot. I didn't know a guitar string could get worn down in just one spot.

Just a little update.
Take care out there.

Blessings in Christ
Linda

Who am I?

My name is Linda Stevenson. I have brown eyes and brown hair that is beginning to turn gray. I wear glasses and without them I am nearsighted and can’t see far ahead. I weigh 221 pounds and I’m 5 feet four inches tall. I have an Oregon driver’s license and two sisters. I have two children and an ex-husband and one grandchild. I have an Associate’s Degree and was a plumber in the U.S. Air Force.

But none of those things are me.

I am a spiritual being. I am a son of God. I am an epistle, known and read of all men. I labor in order to present EVERY MAN perfect in Christ. My past is behind me and I am stretching forth towards the mark of the high calling of God. I am skinny and beautiful and kind.

I love video games and if it is the Lord’s will, I am going to get my dream job at GameStop where I will sell video game equipment to the masses. If it is the Lord’s will – I am going to play the new Zelda game.

I love Johnny and I have resisted him long enough. If it is the Lord’s will then I will go and visit him as soon as I can.

I can come boldly to the throne of God because He does not see me, but only sees Christ in me – the hope of Glory.

Where I walk is holy ground. Jesus died for my sins so that I can be free from sin. He died for EVERY MAN, whether they ever know it or not.

I am the salt of the earth. I am a light in this world.

You are too.

From now on I will endeavor to speak only spirit and life into people that they may be encouraged and grow in Christ. I will only do the Father’s will. His will is for me to love Him and love my neighbor. So that is what I’m going to do.

Much love and blessings in Christ
Linda

P.S. Here is a great video!

Fervent Prayer

Not sure if I told you this story already but here goes.

When I was a baby believer I met a boy at a bible class in Indiana that I really liked. When I got back to Oregon, I got it in my head that I wanted a chance to go out with this boy. I started praying about it. Now at that time I did not know the Lord like I know Him now. I knew OF the Lord but didn’t really know Him personally. Nevertheless, I believed the bible and I started to pray for this boy to move out to Oregon and I would have a chance to go out with him. I prayed night and day. It became part of my daily routine. I didn’t really believe that this particular prayer would be answered, but that did not stop me from continuing to pray.

Seven months later, I went to my regular bible study that I always went to on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and here was this boy! He was at MY bible study! Because I never really believed that all that praying was actually going to be answered, I was in shock that this boy was at my bible study. I thought it was a miracle! Like a gift-wrapped present from God Himself. So I did end up going out with him.

Nobody hurt me like this guy.

It was THE most painful relationship I have ever had. I was devastated when all was said and done and it took me YEARS to get over him.

So I learned some very important lessons with that experience. First, God does answer prayers. Second, be careful what you pray for.

My aunt is a great example of fervent prayer. Every Sunday, her and my cousins (her daughters) get together to pray. It takes a couple hours because first they talk about the needs in the family and what things need to be prayed for and then my aunt writes it all down in a prayer journal. It is a really nice time to fellowship as well. Then when we think the list is complete, we start praying in agreement for everything listed. Plus it is nice to look at things we have prayed for in the past to see what prayers have been answered. I have really enjoyed this time because I have really wanted to have this kind of prayer fellowship in my life.

So this Sunday we were talking about the needs of my aunt and cousins and wrote those things down and of course, continuing to pray for little baby Blake. My aunt said, “Ok Linda. Your turn. What do you want me to write down for us to pray for you specifically?” I answered, “Let’s just draw a big question mark and pray over that!” Everyone laughed but I was actually kind of serious. The Lord knows what that question mark really represents and I just want to pray that His will is accomplished.

“The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.” James 5:16.

That word fervent actually means worketh. The same way that the phrase “worketh in me mightily” is in the following verses: “To whom God would make known what is the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles; which is Christ in you, the hope of glory: Whom we preach, warning every man, and teaching every man in all wisdom; that we may present every man perfect in Christ Jesus: Whereunto I also labour, striving according to his working, which worketh in me mightily.” Col 1:27-29

It’s a verb. An action on my part. I am beginning to get some answers that I have been seeking from the Lord, but the Lord has also been putting it on my heart to pray for these answers and the future in the same way I once prayed for that boy. Non-stop until I see the answer. Of course, being me, I said, Ok Lord, but it better not suck like it did last time! No sucking this time, just fervent prayer until I get the victory. What an amazing Father we have.

Please pray for my big question mark.
Lots of love
Linda

Hope Deferred

(Little baby Blake is home now and doing well. Thank you very much for your prayers. He is currently on a monitor that is tracking his breathing but we are hoping that he is over the hard part and will be fine from now on. Thank the Lord!)

Hope deferred maketh the heart sick: but when the desire cometh, it is a tree of life. Proverbs 13:12.

It’s been a hard week. I had hoped I was going to get that job that (in my mind) would have been perfect for me. $15 an hour plus it was in walking distance Monday thru Friday 8-5 with 401k and dental and health blah blah blah. So I was very disappointed when that guy didn’t call like he said he would.

My aunt got a call from the owner’s of the mobile home she was in the process of buying. They decided not to accept her offer because they were unwilling to get the appraisal that the lender required.

So in an instant – both my aunt and I were sitting there stunned. The plans surrounding the buying of the mobile home, the timelines and the paperwork and even our plans for that day – all fell to the ground. We had prayed that we only wanted to do the Lord’s will and specifically prayed that He would open doors and close doors in accordance with His timing and perfect will.

We understood then, that the Lord had closed those doors. I like to say, “Well, that means the Lord has something better in store.” But that doesn’t mean that I handle the grief part well. The heart sick part is something that I am becoming intimately familiar with.

I had another good interview Friday and they said they would let me know either way by middle of next week. My aunt and I spent the day driving around the other mobile home parks in Casper. We have an appointment to see a different mobile home tomorrow although this mobile home is both older and more expensive than the one she was going to buy before.

I am very thankful that the Lord has confirmed the verse Jeremiah 29:11 for me, it is something I can hold onto, every time my hopes come crashing down once again. “I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord “Plans for good and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

In the meantime we have been cleaning out closets and packing up stuff. We packed all the pictures on the walls in my aunt’s bedroom and the bathroom. My aunt gave me that little plaque with the Jeremiah 29:11 verse on it, since that verse seems to be the theme of this leg of the journey. We still don’t know how long the Lord will have me here, but it forces us to live one day at a time and to not worry about the future. I need to keep my feet on the ground and not keep getting my hopes up and my own expectations on what is going to happen, because nothing is working out the way that I expected it. That in itself is a spiritual lesson. Cling to the Father and be anxious for nothing, giving no thought for tomorrow.

Please continue to pray for us my friends.

Blessings in Christ
Linda

Patience

At dinner with my cousins the other day, one of my cousins said something about praying for patience. I said, "You know, if you pray for patience, the Lord will usually put you in situations where you will have to wait!" I should know, I am waiting right now.

My aunt was approved for her financing this mobile home, but now we have to wait until we can get all the various paperwork together, and stuff that the seller has to fill out. I applied for some jobs and immediately got appointments for three job interviews. I went on one job interview that seemed perfect for me and the phone interview and the face to face interview went great and he said he would call me back by that evening or at the latest the next morning. So I waited for the phone to ring. Wouldn't you know he was a big fat liar and not only didn't call me but blew me off entirely! I hate that! It is so unprofessional. But we know it is the Lord protecting me from working for a jerk. I have another job interview at a different place scheduled for 11am tomorrow.

I got a letter from Johnny. He says that the three days I was in Ontario were the best three days of his life. Yeah, they were pretty special to me too. I am glad the Lord has given me the okay to be friends with Johnny again. I wrote about the Lord and told Johnny that he was the salt of the earth and that he was a light in this world and that if he reads the words of Jesus he will see that it is true. I am encoraging him to continue to seek the Lord for himself and maybe the Lord will lead me back to Ontario again some day. I guess we will wait and shall see.

My cousin's daughter had a baby 10 days ago, but in the last two days the baby has stopped breathing twice. He is in the hospital for observation and we are praying for him to be ok. Please lift him in your prayers - his name is Blake.

So we are waiting on the Lord - to see what His will is for us and little by little, more is revealed to us. I still need patience since whenever I get anxious or worried that things are not happening fast enough, I know it is unbelief that the Lord is not going to come through for me. I know that waiting is good, because it makes me more patient and more trusting that the Father knows what He is doing and will take care of everything.

I can't wait.

Blessings in Christ
Linda

Strongholds

I can’t move my arm. I’m having some kind of charley horse/muscle spasm going on in my shoulder. I can hardly lift it without shooting pain.

Whenever I get weird aches and pains I try to see the parable in it. Arm. Right Arm. Arm of the Flesh. Arm of the Flesh is…

…useless.

Right. Got it.

When I was in the Way International, we all spoke in tongues. We all interpreted and we all prophesied. Someone would call on you to speak in tongues and interpret and you would speak in tongues and then give the interpretation. If they called on you to give a prophecy then you would give a prophecy which was basically an interpretation without the tongue. Always for edification and comfort of the body. It was done by two and at the most by three, in order and the spirits of the prophets were subject to the prophets. It was all very decent and in order.

That is how I learned it. One big thing was the not speaking in tongues without the interpretation in the assembly. That was a BIG NO-NO! Then it could be counterfeit – witchcraft spirits or tribal spirits or all sorts of demonic things could be opened up to by that one act of speaking in tongues without the interpretation. It was a really strong pet doctrine of mine. A stronghold if you will.

A stronghold is a seemingly impenetrable fortress, in our minds. It is usually caused by a doctrine that may even seem biblical or unquestionable yet can actually hinder the movement of the spirit of God in our lives.

So I told my aunt how upset I was by the prayer meeting on Friday night and especially the speaking in tongues without interpretation. I told her about how I learned it. She said, “That is true, but this other way is also valid. It is praying in tongues and it is just as valid as the other one.” She took me to the verses in Acts where people who got born again spoke in tongues without interpretation. I said, “what about the businesses, businesses, businesses part the Lord wouldn’t start with businesses!” She said, “He was just praying in tongues and then was saying out loud the things he was praying in tongues for specifically – like the local businesses.” Oh, I thought.

So I brought up every problem I had including the fact that there can be counterfeit tongues if there is no interpretation. She said, “That is true, there is counterfeits out there, but that is where you have to trust in the Lord. You are covered by the blood of Jesus and you also know better. Nothing demonic can get on you unless you allow it. There are some people that just follow every crazy thing with no discernment. We don’t want to be at the place where we are unteachable. Maybe this is why the Lord brought you here.”

Unteachable. Ouch. Good one auntie.

That night I lay in bed, struggling to get comfortable when every time I moved my arm the pain would wake me up. I thought about being unteachable and also what it would take for me to pray in tongues in a group of people. What would it take for me to put away the doctrine and look at this praying in tongues in a new way. A very wise woman I know told me recently that the Lord was taking me deeper in my faith walk. I realized that in order to break this stronghold, I would truly have to trust the Lord more fully.

The spirits of the prophets are subject to the prophets. That is true, but if I am holding so tightly to the manifestation of speaking in tongues, if I am in so tight in control, then the Holy Spirit manifestations cannot be spontaneous, cannot be inspired and to “flow” as one pastor put it. The trust is that I can let go enough to let the Father move in me in that way, but trust that He alone will protect me from anything that is not of Him. Almost like those trust games where you are going to fall flat backwards and someone is going to catch you. You truly have to trust that person is not going to let you fall.

The cognitive dissonance of this has not quite settled in me yet concerning this. But maybe this IS why the Lord brought me here. Maybe I am not as screwed as I thought. I have more strongholds to battle here than I once thought, but that is good. Maybe this one doctrine has prevented me from seeing true moves of the Spirit.

It’s a walk my friends, and I’m going to fall here and there. Probably more frequently than I care to admit. My life is an open book here and you can reject me if you need to. I understand. How can the Lord fully open my eyes, if I am not first blind?

Please pray for me. Pray that these strongholds in the imagination of my mind can be pulled down, so that I can see clearly. Thanks for sticking with me.

Blessings in Christ
Linda

Just checking in

Hi, just a short note to let you know I am doing much better. I'd like to especially thank Alicia, Ma and Yolanda for their prayers and encouragement. Will write more soon.